How do you get closure and peace after a painful break up? There is a human bias to romanticize the past, which is why it's so important to ACTIVELY REMIND ourselves of the good and bad of the relationship, instead of seeing it through rose-tinted glasses. Remind yourself of where your needs weren't met, or sources of difficulty and anxiety this person was causing you, or other ways that you struggled in the relationship so that you can see the whole truth of your pain and start your journey to